It’s Not Smartphones or Media Stressing Young People—It’s Judgment
- Eileen McDargh
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
Growing Pressure to Monitor Cell Phone Use
I found this article by Adam Grant enlightening, helpful, and hopeful. Here’s why: I have little control my grandchildren’s use of smartphones and social media, and I hope their parents monitor it.
Psychologists recently released a 35-year study of nearly 83,000 students across the U.S., U.K., and Canada. Behold: young adults feel a growing pressure to be flawless! Parents and teachers hold unrealistic expectations and too often criticize children. It’s not just teachers but also coaches.
There is a growing pressure to monitor cell phone use in efforts to curb use and remove the stress, so that young people can at least start making better judgement calls.
Countries can also jump in. Australia set 16 as the minimum age for social media.
Let’s all back off!!
Remember, mistakes don’t make you a failure. They make you a learner. You can share this lesson and others on Adam Grant’s Substack or his podcasts on breaking up with perfectionism. Read The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown or The Perfection Trap by Thomas Curran. And considering how many typing mistakes I make, I’m a good target.
In The Gifts of Imperfection, Brené Brown, a leading expert on shame, authenticity, and belonging, shares ten guideposts on the power of Wholehearted living—a way of engaging with the world from a place of worthiness.
Each day we face a barrage of images and messages from society and the media telling us who, what, and how we should be. We are led to believe that if we could only look perfect and lead perfect lives, we'd no longer feel inadequate. So most of us perform, please, and perfect, all the while thinking, "What if I can't keep all of these balls in the air? Why isn't everyone else working harder and living up to my expectations? What will people think if I fail or give up? When can I stop proving myself?"
In her ten guideposts, Brown engages our minds, hearts, and spirits as she explores how we can cultivate the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, "No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough," and to go to bed at night thinking, "Yes, I am sometimes afraid, but I am also brave. And, yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable, but that doesn't change the truth that I am worthy of love and belonging."
Today, burnout and depression are at record levels, driven by a combination of intense workplace competition, the comparative world of social media, the quest for elite credentials, and helicopter parenting. Society continually broadcasts the need to want more, and that we have to be perfect to get it. Why is this a trap, and how can we escape it?
Gathering a wide range of contemporary evidence, acclaimed professor at the London School of Economics Thomas Curran calls for both a mindset shift and broader, societal change. He explores the paradoxical effects of perfectionism on everything from performance to social and financial inequality, and shows what we can do as individuals to resist the modern-day pressure to be perfect - and how we can create a culture that celebrates the joys of imperfection.
If you've ever felt overwhelmed by the soul-crushing need to compete for more or to be the best, The Perfection Trap is for you. Learn to prioritise what's important, meet the world where it is and strive for purpose instead of more by embracing the power of 'good enough' in your life.
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