I wanted to share one story with you of a special little spot in Manhattan: St. Paul's Chapel in the Wall Street district. Saint Paul's is part of Trinity Episcopal parish and is the oldest public building to be in continuous use in Manhattan. It was built in 1766 and was the chapel George Washington came to pray the day of his Inauguration. It has become most recognized today because it is located directly across the street from the World Trade Towers. On Sept. 11 when the towers imploded, pieces of the buildings showered over the chapel and graveyard. Inside the chapel, the parish had already set up stations for relief workers, first-responders, and grieving families searching for their loved ones. For over 8 months, this small simple chapel was the center of comfort both physical and emotional for tens of thousands of people. Twenty-four hours a day/7 days a week, volunteers of all kinds--podiatrists, massage therapists, cooks, chaplains, "just caring folks" and more provided whatever they could for the bone and heart-weary people.We first stood across from St. Paul's and saw behind the steeple the partly empty sky where one World Trade tower had stood and a silver shining new tower with only a few more floors yet covered in glass and steel. This 247 year old structure sits humbly in sharp contrast to the soaring modern buildings of business around it. Though there were many people in the chapel, we all walked through in almost hushed reverence, looking at the photos, the letters, the piles of insignias left by grateful rescue units from around the world. We walked around the building to the old graveyard in back. Though the road and construction noise from the new tower site is deafening, there was still a "feeling" of silence among these worn headstones and the shade of the trees in full leaf. I remembered well that day--September 11, 2001.  Mom was in Fort Lauderdale and, as was my habit, I called her early in the morning to chat while I had my coffee. She, as was her habit, was watching the Today Show. She always turned down the volume while we talked but she suddenly said, "Why are they showing a picture of the World Trade Center with smoke coming out of it?" I said it was probably just the anniversary of the 1993 World Trade bombing or something. I turned on my TV and we were in shock as we watched the horror unfold before us. For the next hour we stayed on the phone, watching and praying together. I said, "This building is going to implode. It can't keep burning like this. " No sooner had I said that when the tower collapsed. For the next week Mom and I were on the phone a lot, just needing to connect for comfort as we tried to absorb the enormity and deep suffering of this devastating event. For the next month that year we all were the best we are capable of being as a people, a nation and a world. Though much has happened in the intervening years because of this tragedy that is not so noble, when I was at St. Paul's I felt it was still hallowed ground, a prayerful spot where the pain, suffering, caring and humanity was embraced and salved. I knew that this was the right place to leave some of Mom's ashes and that of another friend's mom. I tucked them in the cool, damp ground under some flowering plants in the graveyard, not far from a small American flag someone else had left. They will now nurture these plants surrounded by this special place and people. Amen. Amen. Love, Susan

No industry is immune to the influence of our current economic slowdown. The pace of change, the dot.com disappearances, and the flushing sound heard on Wall Street throw many organizations into knee-jerk reactions. From consolidations, mergers, and acquisitions to re-engineering profit centers, creating new product lines and calming a variety of stakeholders, managers are faced with turbulent situations. Responding to such pressures requires both a level head as well as the realization that it’s still true that the business of building a business-whether new or old economy-still requires sound management, good marketing, and most importantly, good people. Jettisoning employees in financial tough times can very well result in losing industrious producers, top talent, longtime workers, and top managers. Such short-sightedness can be costly on many fronts. The cost of recruiting talented workers typically runs 70- 200% of their annual salaries. A loss of sales personnel can hurt a company’s bottom line. Lose front-line customer service people and the customer might be penalized. A company doesn’t make profits. People do. And because people DO make the profits, keeping solid employees has never been more critical. Lose the war NOW in talent, have your best folks jump ship to the competition, or cut too far, and you’ll be scrambling for the brainpower necessary when the economy turns around. How DO you win the talent war in times like these? The good news is that “show me the money” is not the primary reason people stay. A recent study of 4000 professional and clerical workers found that job satisfaction keeps more workers than pay levels alone. The survey found that only 6% of people who were satisfied with their jobs but unhappy with their pay plan to quit. The percentage jumps to 27% when they were dissatisfied with their jobs but happy with their pay! If they were unhappy with both their pay and job situation, the percentage of those ready to bail jumped to 41%! The challenge: what makes for satisfaction? What do valued employees want? A two-year study by Dr. Beverly Kaye, author of Love’Em or Lose’Em, said what employees valued most is: career growth, learning and development; exciting work with consistent performance expectations, accountability and challenge; meaningful work ( making a contribution), great people, being part of a team, good boss, recognition for a job well done, fun on the job, autonomy over work, work/life balance, and flexibility in areas such as work hours. It’s easier to put the burden of retention of pay. Pay is easier and quicker. But investing money without investing in the relationship with employees garners little true commitment. Creating a culture for satisfaction takes time, prompts internal analysis, and leaves long-term positive results on the bottom line. Based upon the work done by Kaye and her team at Career Systems International (CSI), retention practices by good managers focus on three areas: development, style, and environment. The developmental focus begins with understanding what hiring practices make for a good fit from the outset. It includes such practices as job enrichment, career growth, mentorship, and expansion of goals into areas of challenge suited for each individual. A manager’s style has much to do with retention. This skill set involves informal as well as formal recognition practices, interpersonal skill development between a manager and the employee, sharing power, and self-awareness of behaviors that disenfranchise employees. An environmental focus for retention means that managers explore practices that encourage information sharing, alignment of values, and the creation of workplace where laughter and joy are present. While few organizations can (or want to) match the zany reputation of Southwest Airlines, simple, spontaneous bits of fun can make a great difference. One power company in the Pacific Northwest has a Frisbee memo day in which all pieces of internal correspondence are twirled down a hall to the receiving party! Turn a light on your management practices and see if you’re winning the talent war. Retool, retrain and you will retain! © The Resiliency Group.  All rights reserved. You may reprint this article so long as it remains intact with the byline and if all links are made live. Since 1980, professional speaker and Hall of Fame member Eileen McDargh has helped Fortune 100 companies as well as individuals create connections that count and conversations that matter. Her latest book is Gifts from the Mountain-Simple Truths for Life’s Complexities. Her other books include Talk Ain’t Cheap…It’s Priceless and Work for a Living and Still Be Free to Live, one of the first books to address the notion of balance and authentic work.  Find out more about this compelling and effective professional speaker and join her free newsletter by visiting http://www.EileenMcDargh.com.

In one of your desk drawers keep one or two hilarious photos that you love, some silly putty, yo-yours or a wind-up toy. Add anything that makes you smile... even under stress. When you need a brief break go into the drawer to look at the pictures or to spend five minutes playing with a toy that brings a smile to your face and lets you get back to work stress free! If you need supplies of fun toys visit your local Toys R Us.

From the files of "we have more technology than we know what to do with it" comes a new tool so you don't have to listen to your voice mail. Services such as YouMail allows users to access voice messages in an e-mail or online. The idea is to minimize the time you spend retrieving voice mail. But remember, the more important the issue or the relationship, returning that call is essential. When you don't talk phone to phone or voice to voice details may go missing, tone of voice and visual cues aren't there and you just missed a valuable chance to create a relationship with your potential client, a colleague, or employee. My advice: talk person to person if at all possible. If it isn't, call and speak to your potential client in real time. The more you build the relationship, the more you profit. For more ideas like this look at my book "Talk Ain't Cheap... It's Priceless!".

Are your employees engaged? Employees are engaged when they are involved in and inspired by their work. They are committed to their employer and invested in the success of the company. Engaged employees are easier to retain and they make a difference in the bottom line by creating enhanced relationships with customers. How do you go about creating engaged employees? Follow the steps below. 1. Be approachable. Don't just say you have an open door… really have one. 2. Encourage and value their input. 3. Offer additional benefits such as flextime, tuition reimbursement, managerial training and technical training. 4. Communicate clearly and honestly at all times. 5. Survey employees regularly to get feedback on how to improve their working environment. 6. Bring in consultants to help them with issues of work/life balance or organizational skills. 7. Make an effort to make work fun. Have a book of the month club and provide all employees with a copy.

In the scheme of culinary talent, I cook a little better than average. The operative word is "cook". I cook killer soups: soups that vary in ingredients and size; soups that range from stick-to-the-ribs to light-and-fancy; soups that contain whatever leftovers haunt the Tupperware containers. But baking? That's another matter. Personally, I have this aversion to following recipes. Maybe that's why I like soups. Broth is pretty forgiving about whatever you add to it. But baking—there's the rub. Fail to follow directions and angel food cake tastes like the devil. Brownies turn into blackies. And lemon chiffon pie tastes like Chiffon dish detergent. All this makes my lemon cake nothing short of a miracle. I don't follow the recipe (natch!) and the result is a tangy confection that can be frozen and sliced into delicate pieces of pure delight. It has become my signature dessert for guests and a gift I send to friends, to colleagues, and to clients. Besides its mouthwatering sweet/sour deliciousness, folks seem just blown away by the fact that I took the time in this too time-intense world to bake them a cake. I realize the power of the old Pillsbury ad: "Nothing says lov'n like something from the oven…." Lemon cake has become the metaphor that connects our relationship. You, too, have your own version of lemon cake. What time will you spend to connect with someone who is important to you?

In one day, I experienced the following: a store clerk who looked like she was bored stupid and begrudgingly took my money for an item. a waiter who got our order wrong, never apologized, and never thanked us when we left. a customer service rep who told me how many barrel hoops I’d have to go through to get an answer, never explained why, and never once said, “would you please…” All of these are examples of bad manners. Plain and simple. And obviously a forgotten skill. It is certainly true that company leadership and corporate culture affect not only the bottom line but the customer experience as well but there are other factors involved.  Companies can create a memorable customer experience without much expense by teaching employees the rules of etiquette. Unfortunately, it seems that schools and families have abdicated the teaching of any of these rules so it is up to the company to teach employees themselves. Following are a few basics to help you get started.  Rather than make these rules, make them tips and make them fun.  Send out a few every month in the employee newsletter and catch employees using what they learned and praise them.. 1. Remind employees to always smile and look customers in the eye when speaking to them. 2. Employees who deal with customers over the phone should answer on the first or second ring, ask permission before putting a caller on hold and make sure that the customer is not left holding for more than a few seconds. 3.  Even when a customer is red, hot mad an employee should always keep their cool, be polite, agree that the situation is frustrating and do everything they can to find a solution. 4.  Remind employees that they should never carry on a  personal conversation on the phone or in person with another employee while customers are waiting to be served. 5. Please and thank you are small words with huge impact. Try it!

Want to become involved in advocating for family friendly policies in America? MomsRising is organizing millions of people to work together to change our culture and our laws to be more family friendly. Using the power of the Internet MomsRising is electronically supporting citizen involvement in creating policies that will support families at home and at work. For more information visit http://www.momsrising.org/

Security rests in adaptability. Our current uncertain times can either freeze us from action, or create a space where we strengthen our ability to adapt. Remember, survival is based on "requisite variety". That's a fancy biological term that basically means the organism that has the greatest number of responses to a situation has the greater chance of surviving. Watts Wacker, a noted futurist, offers things we can do to gain more options for ourselves: Learn to be a better listener. You don't learn when you are talking. Read a trade magazine from a different industry. Find two things in every issue that relate to your business. Let your kids tutor you in a subject they know more about than you do. Volunteer, and see the world through a different window. Read what has stood the test of time. Read Aristotle, Shakespeare, Adam Smith. Reading the great books helps frame your thinking.

John is like many sales folks. He's clever, competent, competitive and VERY hungry. In fact, looking at his bank account, he's begun to feel some panic when he sees that his services aren't being retained at the normal clip. Face it, John is scared. The desperation comes out in conversation. "I've just got to book some business. I'm making tons of cold calls a day. I think I've lost my edge. Why aren't people hiring me?" The answer: because John is TRYING to sell. He's focusing on himself and his need. And the self-service inevitably comes out. What's John to do? (1) Stop cold calling. It's only feeding his feelings of rejection. The negative spiral just sends him deeper into deeper pit. (2) Go back to his files and look for clients with whom he had a great rapport and did good work. Read the files and then visualize the relationship he had with them. (3) Call these past clients but not to sell. Instead, it's time to let them talk about their current state of affairs, how they are doing, and just catch up. If there's a way John can help them, great. But that's NOT the object of the call. John's call is strictly to be of service with no personal agenda. That's it. Results? John finds himself relaxing into his natural state of being. His finds that's clients are delighted to hear from him. One or two begin talking about new ways they might use his service. He makes a few appointments. This is not a fairy tale. It happened to a wonderful sales colleague whom I coached. She discovered that when she let go of her needs, her internal well began to fill up with fresh ideas, renewed relationships, and possibilities for work driven by the clients and not by her. Serving beats selling many days.

It started at the rental car turn-in location. My friend is a "platinum" with Hertz - a great benefit I discovered when the rental agencies are a considerable distance from the terminal. Our driver grinned as she slide into the driver's seat and said she could hardly wait for school to begin. Turns out she's a school bus driver and with her seniority, she gets to pick her route. Her passion: autistic children. "I just love 'em," she grinned. "I get them again this year." Fascinating. Sincere. And difficult. We stopped to grab a bite of lunch before long flights. The waitress excitedly nodded when we ordered the cashew chicken sandwich. "It's our new menu. We just got it yesterday. That's a great choice!" She grinned and gave us a two-thumbs up signal. I don't know about you, but I rarely get service help excited by a menu. It was as if SHE personally made the sandwich. Fascinating. Sincere. And standing on your feet all day - difficult. At an adjacent Frontier airlines gate, I asked where was my plane and how come no rep was at the gate. "Listen," she laughed, "it's also my gate. I can do amazing things. Watch how quick I get this plane loaded. I'll do the same for yours. You'll see." I did. I's almost 6pm on a Sunday night and folks are cranky and tired. Not my gate attendant. True to her word, she efficiently started the process AND took time to actually read every boarding pass and call the passenger my name. She patted my arm when I went through. "See, Eileen. Told you I could do this." Fascinating. Sincere. And the job of a gate agent is difficult - very difficult. My seat mate was a young man, a rotating guidance counselor for grades 6-12 in the Costa Mesa, CA school district. "There aren't many men in my line of work - and particularly men of color," he remarked offhandedly. "DO you like what you do?" I asked. His eyes opened wide and he offered a wide smile. "I love it. I really feel like I am making a difference. So many of these kids have no one to talk to-- no one to model the right behavior." He proceeded to tell me a series of stories that would break your heart. "I'™s when they come back after they leave school that is most rewarding. You just never know if what you say today will suddenly click in years later." Fascinating. Sincere. And difficult - very VERY difficult. In each instance, the joy came from how each connected with another human being. It was the CONNECTION that made the most. Not the money. Not the title. The eyes staring at each other. The hands reaching out to help. Fascinating. Sincere. And maybe - with deliberate intent we could try it. Might NOT be all that difficult.

Is it my imagination or has service gone the way of the dodo bird, tax breaks for small cars, and an 8-hour workday? Here's my proof: Within one 24 hour period, I thought I had landed on a strange planet, spoke no English, and furthermore, was penalized for wanted to (gasp!) spend money with a business. First - there's the voice mail roulette. How many times have we slammed down a phone in dismay because not ONE option was what we wanted? But this call was even more absurd. The scenario: the digital avatar's voice saying, "Let me get some information first." You know you're in for a bad time when you say "no", and the digital sweetie says, "I'm sorry. I do not understand that word." It was one of my choices, for Pete's sake! How many different languages does it take to say NO!!!! Second deal breaker: I keep trying to get an operator. I press "o". "I'm sorry," says the avatar. "That is not an option." I start screaming "operator". "I'm sorry," says the avatar. "That is not an option." Don't ask me how I finally broke through to a human but when I did, I was informed that the response which would have gotten me immediately to a human was "agent." Now gang, I was not calling the airlines - though it is hard to believe. It was a phone company. Since when do they have "agents"? Final straw: I am now trying to get an 800 number. Another digital voice says, "I'm sorry. Our office hours are from 8 - 5:00pm EST. Please call back." Excuuuuuuuse me.! That means that those of us in the other time zones are non-customers. So, this is going to make "the competitive edge" really simple. Answer your phone. And if you can do it right away - get back within a 24 hour or less period. LISTEN to people when they call. Return every phone call. And make yourself available when the customer needs you. (Heck - on the West Coast, I take calls at 6:00am. I'm not a hero - but it IS 9:00am in Boston.) Simple. Doable. And not rocket science.