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Friday, September 18 my phone went crazy with texts. E-mails began flooding my in-box. Shock, Sorrow, Dismay, Pain, and Anxiety echoed in all of them. Even in the press reports that came in rapid fire, not one person expressed satisfaction that this lioness of gender equity and fairness was gone. She was a warrior for justice, equality, and democracy. I’d say that’s a pretty heady legacy. I cried when I heard the news. So did my neighbor Steve. So did my sister and my twin brother. Forgetting the politics of this moment and that some factions are not-so-quietly gloating that they can stack the court and influence outcomes for years to come, RBG’s legacy of consistency and integrity superseded differences. Her friendship with Justice Anthonin Scalia until his death in February 2016 brought together two people of vastly different ideologies. He was a gregarious conservative, she a soft-spoken, self-described “flaming feminist litigator.” "As annoyed as you might be about his zinging dissent, he's so utterly charming, so amusing, so sometimes outrageous you can't help but say, 'I'm glad that he's my friend and colleague," she said of their relationship in 2008 and reported again in The Hill. Here are three lessons we can learn from Ruth Bader Ginsburg: Lesson #1: Friendship does not depend upon agreement but rather respect. Bullying, name-calling and demeaning an individual only fuels animosity and partisanship. Ginsburg mirrored the ability to be brilliant in her court rulings and writings but then could turn to a so-called adversary and look for what was good in that person. Imagine if more people did that today! Lesson #2: Tenacity, resilience and clear values triumph in the end. Ginsburg never wavered from her belief that women have a place at all tables. It took her 30 years to finally be approved for the Supreme Court. But along the way, RBG was consistent in her actions to open the world of work and education for women. Imagine entering Harvard Law school, the only woman among 500 men, and being asked why she took the place of a man? I am guessing that comment was one of many she endured in her path to seek equality for women. Lesson #3: Humor is ALWAYS a good wild card. Soft-spoken and tiny, RBG could come up with a twinkle in her eye, laugh over being compared to the rapper RBG (Notorious) and find herself riding an elephant in India with fellow judge Scalia. In later years, as her writing became sharper and caustic, she nevertheless found time to be a regular character of Kate McKinnon's on Saturday Night Live; the subject of the biopic On the Basis of Sex, starring Rogue One's Felicity Jones; and perhaps most recognizably, the inspiration for a wellspring of T-shirts, tattoos, Halloween costumes and Internet memes. In keeping with the lessons from RBG and the idea of legacy, I believe I need to be better at modeling her 3 lessons. What about you?

While I’ve written extensively about burnout and the attendant exhaustion, a colleague gave me a different viewpoint that I think should be explored. Specifically, he is bored. He’s exhausted from trying NOT to be bored. He’s not using his talents. Lockdown has him locked out of physically being with people who are stimulating. Libraries are closed and bookstore and Amazon purchases add up. He lives alone in a lovely house and rarely sees his neighbors. Got the picture? Until Tom brought it up, I had not given a thought to the very real trigger that comes from boredom. Let me be more specific—when the head and the heart aren’t engaged in meaningful ways, it’s exhausting to try and find what will jump start our emotions and our intellect. Here’s what we came up with to help Tom begin to move from burnout to breakthrough. Intellect: Watch one TED talk a day. Subscribe to Blinkist—an app which gives you synopsis of books. Watch Dry Bar Comedy on You Tube—(Tom has a not-so-secret wish to be a stand-up performer). Learn and/or try one new thing he has never done every month. Emotional: Call and/or go see a mutual friend who is 90 years-old and in Assisted Living. Now we can only talk to her by sitting outside through a window. But hey—that’s a connection. Reach out to some of the young men and women who are part of Boys’ and Girls’ Clubs of Orange County. Tom has been a supporter and on the Board. Calls on Facetime or Zoom let them know an adult cares about them. What suggestions do you have to quench the burnout flames of boredom? I’d love to know. You can purchase my new book today at Amazon.com

What a difference a year makes! Last year this time, we were with daughter Holly and her family in the mountains of Washington.  This year, we watched the same family at virtual graduations: Clare from So. Oregon U with a degree in Environmental Science and Alicia with a Master’s in Public Administration. Our hugs are but a distant memory from Thanksgiving. Last year this time, I signed a contract with Berrett Koehler Publishers for my next book (see below). This year, the book was born on August 4 and the desperate need for moving from burnout to balance and building resilience has never felt more critical or complicated. Last year, speaking and consulting dates packed my calendar. This year, emptiness abounds and “virtual” is the password. Here’s the point. The unprecedented convergence of a global pandemic, severe social unrest, and a dramatic economic downturn can prompt feelings of anxiety, confusion, depression and even despair.  We want “yesterday” to come back.  It will not. Instead, our ability to grow through these times rests on three key things: Seek multiple alternatives and possibilities for what you confront TODAY… not yesterday or tomorrow… TODAY!  A virtual graduation was surprisingly intimate, personal, and more special than a crowded auditorium. I’m discovering “found-time” to give podcast interviews, write guests blogs, and reach out to past clients. Control the controllable. I can’t control Covid-19 but I can follow the advice of medical professionals.  I can’t control the anger and hatred that bursts across screen and newspaper. But I can control how I reach out to others, how I invite conversations to understand, and how I choose to learn more of a history I know little about. Laugh. Laughter is truly perspective. It tells you what is extraneous and what is truly serious. Laughter was Abe Lincoln’s escape valve in the middle of the Civil War. Small steps? Yes. But remember, a rain drop over time can take down a mountain. Purchase now at https://amzn.to/3eiPRJl

Traditional titles in organizations offer little insight into what research says today's workers and the incoming generation are seeking. A salary and good health care benefits are givens. But here is what else a Deloitte Millennial survey reported: workers want purposeful work, the ability to blend work and life, and an opportunity for growth and advancement. My data also says they want a place where laughter and fun are not forbidden. Furthermore, the term "leader" doesn't just belong in a C-suite. Rather, a resilient organization that will attract and retain talent works diligently to make sure that a culture is created in which everyone has a title. After all, engagement is a two-way street. Just as a marriage doesn't work if only one partner is doing the heavy lifting, so too in business. Go beyond the titles of CEO, COO, CIO and CTO. In fact, these titles only use three of the available vowels. Look what happens if an organization gives everyone a few other titles. The CAO is the Chief Accountability Officer. The questions that all would be asked to consider are these: · What are you holding yourself accountable for? · At the end of the day, what did you achieve? · What are you doing to develop your personal and professional skills? · How have you leveraged your network? · Have you asked for feedback to assess your performance? · How are you integrating your work with your life and controlling what you can? · How could you benefit from 360 feedback? Note that these questions also apply to the CEO, COO, CIO and CTO. The CUO is the Chief Understanding Officer. The softest skills are also the hardest skills to master. Without understanding the needs and values of others, it is difficult to effectively communicate and solve challenges as well as look for opportunities - all hallmarks of a resilient organization. This is why I always start every management offsite with a segment that allows participants to understand each other better. Consider these questions: How well do you understand the customer or client? What does he or she really need from you? What value can you add? How well do you understand your colleagues? Remember the platinum rule: treat others as they wish to be treated - not as you wish to be treated. Are you listening to yourself with understanding? What will help you feel a sense of purpose and pleasure? Without understanding, which is a function of deep listening, it is hard to move forward. The book of Proverbs was right: seek first to understand rather than to be understood. Lastly, to varying degrees – even for the sternest is the CYO: Chief Yippee Officer. No one wants to work with or buy from people whose faces are carved in stone or people who can barely grunt a greeting much less smile with genuine delight. To be sure, some will grab this title with gusto, making themselves in charge of merriment, fun, and finding the humor that creates a spark for creativity. For others, a "yippee" might be couched in feeling the joy of accomplishment. When you laugh at "it", you can live with it. If everyone held this title of CYO, there would be no room for the person who casts a black cloud over others, who complains constantly, who moans about every assignment. Some people develop eye strain just looking for trouble. A CYO does NOT seek trouble. Consider adopting these three additional vowels in the Romance languages: A, U, and Y when crafting and keeping a resilient organization. Best of all, there is no cost, no board approval, or statute of limitations. Begin today with accountability, understanding, and laughter. Tomorrow is too late. The future for leaders starts now.

As Covid-19 swept across the globe in early 2020, whole workforce's left offices and began working from home. Reports indicate that two-thirds of workers are more productive working at home than in an office. Sounds good! But there’s a downside. Now that people are working remotely, the evidence suggests that people are starting earlier and finishing later as they try and juggle everything from home-schooling kids to wanting to prove to an absent management that they are tip-top employees. Burnout is surging along with mental health issues. Here’s where resiliency enters the picture. Resiliency is all about energy management. An exhausted employee has squandered his energy quotient. The well-being of employees needs to be top-of-mind for leaders. As workers navigate changes in personal and work lives, smart leaders must invite answers to these critical questions: What are you doing that you now question its value, its purpose, and its efficiency? Are there meetings you feel compelled to attend that in retrospect, were a waste of time (and energy) ? If you could design your perfect work-at-home-day, what would it look like? Where should we invest in technology to help and where is technology a hindrance? Where do you think we’ve prioritized efficiency over everything else and thus zapped your energy/resiliency? Do you feel listened to by management? Remember that prioritizing resilience presents an opportunity to declutter organizations. It can also result in agile work practices PLUS increase employee engagement.

I recently read a report of the research from Stanford GSB professors, Jennifer Aaker and Szu-chi Huang. It spoke of the power of seeing the current ravages of Covid-19 and subsequent economic breakdown through the lens of an ongoing journey rather than a destination. As a writer, hiker, and a lover of adventure travel, I am captured by the thought of seeing these events as an unfolding journey. In my journeys, we’ve encountered obstacles that ranged from dangerous snow-covered passes, altitude sickness, and bruised knees to fried worms, lost trails, and rationed water. Each incident managed to scare me and also show me what I could get through even when I didn’t think I could do it. Of course, at the time, I was terrified, uncertain and anxious. However, looking back at each experience, I can see how I grew through each event. What fascinated me about the work of Huang and Aaker is that their conclusion urges us to see each phase as a place of growth, particularly as one looks back. If this is indeed a journey and not a destination, then the events that are so unsettling can be transformed into opportunities for growth. You’ve done it before. I know you have. Events you didn't think you could make through ended up as memories and not as monsters… IF you will focus on the strengths you used to get through them. As a friend recently said, “I’m thankful for my struggles as it helped my stumble upon my strength.” Something to think about.

Everyone can itemize just how these times are awful: rising number of COVID-19 cases, over 130,000 deaths in the U.S. alone, job losses, businesses closing, social unrest, fear and anxiety, depression, anger and violence… the list goes on. Awful to be sure. Dwelling on all this overwhelming awfulness results in deepening the emotional burdens of negativity but I found some good news in a research abstract published by the Association for Psychological Sciences. In three very different experiments, the researchers discovered that finding moments of awe (amazement and wonder) expanded people’s feelings of well-being, altered decision making in positive ways, and reduced the stress of feeling compressed by time. The more awe moments participants experienced; life felt more satisfying that it had been otherwise. The experience of awe leaves one feeling humbled, interconnected with others, and everyday concerns feel less overwhelming. Plus, people who experience awe show lower tissue levels of an inflammatory cytokine associated with the risk of heart disease. Consider these practices that can bring awe into your life: Become a student of nature, watching for all the moments that remind you of the complexity, beauty, and abundance of the natural world. For example, right now, dozens of monarch butterflies are twirling above my head. The females have already placed eggs on the milkweed plants which the caterpillars will devour. In due time, the caterpillar will be turning upside down, splitting its skin, nestling inside the chrysalis to form wings, thorax, antennae and then emerge. Over the years, I’ve managed to video tape each stage of this incredible metamorphosis. It is AWESOME and humbling. Keep an AWE journal. There’s magic indeed in even recalling a moment of awe and bringing it to life on a page. Remember when you held your child for the first time? Or how about watching a comet blaze across the sky? Perhaps it was standing on the rim of the Grand Canyon or looking up at the moon rising over the High Sierras. My latest moment of awe was having a little 3 year-old run, grab my legs, and hug them enthusiastically. She was stark naked too! Her innocence in that gesture touched my heart—particularly when her mom said that Olivia didn’t do that often to others! Take an AWE walk. Between computers and cellphones, the world of technology surrounds us with noise, demands, social media posts, and press bulletins which speed across our eyes. Leave all that behind and get out. Even if you think there’s not much to see in your neighborhood, pretend you are from outer space. See what catches your eye, perhaps pulls you into a reverie, or offers a familiar sight that is suddenly changed. Perhaps a flower growing in the sidewalk crack? The elderly woman who is walking slowly without her portable oxygen? (I saw her today, shouted a “good to see you out” and gave her two thumbs up. The smile she offered just made my heart happy.) Watch an awe-inspiring video. We’re into watching—for the third time—the National Geographic film on the courtship of birds. I also play the video we took when in San Ignacio Lagoon in the Baja with the birthing gray whales. There’s nothing more awe-inspiring than being able to bend over and kiss the head of a 40-ton California Grey whale. It is said that we should not count the number of breaths in our life but rather the number of times something took our breath away. Try any of these and watch how—even for a short period—you are surrounded by present moment awareness and grateful.

You can never grow a garden—a business—unless you plant seeds. You know the seeds: ideas, talent, and investments. Consider these garden concepts: Plant seeds and give space to the sowers. A green thumb leader knows that it is only through dialogue that ideas can sprout and take root. Instead of jealously guarding “my ideas, my client, my territory”, a leader with an eye toward growing a “garden” takes no ownership but rather seeks to find which seeds have merit and who are the other “gardeners”. As for giving space to the sewer, consider my vagabond tomato plant. It grew by surprise. In like fashion, where are the unexpected opportunities that can spring up if allowed to flourish? When newcomers bring ideas from other industries and businesses, are they welcomed or are they rooted out because “that’s not how we do things here”. Feed different plants differently. Not every plant is fed the same thing, yet all plants must eat. My roses need a systemic for the rust and mildew, along with a topical spray. My oranges just need some citrus fertilizer every now and then. A green thumb leader understands the truism that “nothing is so unequal as the equal treatment of unequals”. Just as each voice has its own unique sonogram, each employee, associate, stakeholder needs a unique blend of “food”. For some, it’s “numbers”. “Give me numbers and I thrive.” For many, it’s the opportunity to learn and advance in knowledge. For others, it’s the engaging nature of the work itself that offers fulfillment. One size does not fit all. Weeding is backbreaking work. A hula hoe alone will not suffice. It was not enough to turn over the soil and think that I had emptied my garden of the weeds. In fact, because I didn’t bend over and get close enough to the ground, I picked up only the surface “weeds”. What I really had managed to do was to churn the stronger ones into a hiding place where they surfaced stronger and more invasive then ever. A green thumb leader hates this part of the task. It means fact-finding. Accountability. And time. Not everything that is “green” belongs in my garden. Not every associate belongs with you. In fact, firing customers at times can also be the healthiest long-term fertilizer for a vibrant business Take time to stop and smell the roses. I can get so overwhelmed with the “work” of my garden that I forget why I planted it. Just sitting by the side of the garden, watching my neighbors’ delight when I deliver bouquets to their doors, or smelling the fragrance in the evening are all the reminders I need. Why have you planted your “garden”? Are there people who delight in the work of your hands? What is the aroma that lingers after you have turned off the lights for the night? Here’s wishing green thumbs for all of us.

In these crazy, confusing times, having a simple metaphor to serve as a model for growing our business can be helpful. My instruction comes from the natural world. From my home office, I can look out and see my garden. It’s loaded with wonderful, terrible sights, sights that mirror much I find in many of our companies. You’d recognize it too. There are roses speckled with mildew and rust from the fog carried on the breath of El Nino. Weeds have taken over many patches of dirt, despite the fact that I have gone over them with a hula hoe. (For the non-gardener, that’s a triangular hoe that saves your back while weeding. Supposedly, you scrub away at the ground, loosening the weeds –and anything else that stands in the way—while leaving the good soil behind.) The rogue cherry tomato plant however has taken off … again. Sticky green arms with tiny green/yellow fruit now stretch in all directions. The plant must have been the gift from some bird that dropped a seed as it flew to a nest in the pine tree. I didn’t think a cherry tomato would grow in that patch of adobe clay. My feathered seed-sower proved me wrong. What I must do to get my garden back in shape, to make it world class and ready for the competitive eye of my next-door neighbor, is exactly what every leader must do: seed, feed, and weed. How I perform seeding, feeding, and weeding depends upon the season, the unexpected turns of nature, and the makeup of my garden. Walk with me through my garden and you’ll see the analogies for our work world. Consider the “season”. In today’s 24-hour, global economy, it would appear that there is no season, anything that distinguishes night from day. Grow, grow. Sell, sell. But the smart leader watches the sky, reads the clouds, and can tell when there are shifts to indicate a new season. Bring products to market at the wrong time or introduce an idea without understanding timing and the “garden” can quickly resemble a piece of scorched earth. Watch for trends. Read magazines like Wired and Fast Company. Explore new planned communities and see how people are choosing to live. In these latter two areas, you’ll find a move toward “Main Street U.S.A.”. Sure, high speed connections and technology are placed in the home, but new designs incorporate walking paths, close-at-hand stores, and alleyways connecting homes. When the COVID-19 is controlled, being together will become even more essential. Give credence to the unexpected and control what you can control. The El Nino weather that not only raised havoc with my roses but spawned dangerous storms and opposing draughts throughout the world is an example of our helplessness to control some of our environment. The same thing is true in business. Market turndowns, a global pandemic, the scandals of a Presidency, an airline strike—you name it—there are many things that can impact our business. A green thumb leader takes all possible precautions and then remains flexible and ready for the unexpected. Scenario planning, a strategy first employed by Royal Dutch Shell, brings experts from a wide range of fields to discuss actions if different scenarios take place. Scenario planning allows you to think out—in advance—various options. In like fashion, my corner of the garage has all the tools, sprays, and plant potions for probable surprises. As a leader, what options do you have in your “tool chest” Next week, we’ll look at how a leader seeds, feeds and weeds!

Although this post will run after July 4th, I sit here on Independence Day remembering all the ways Mom LOVED this holiday. From fireworks, to hot dogs, to parades, to waving the flag, Mom was all in… particularly when it came to telling us for the 1000th time, the tale of Edith Pickles. It seems that Mom’s uncle had a store and would set up a fireworks booth in front of the store to sell that merchandise. Mom and her cousin loved to get there early and handle the sales. But then came Edith Pickles. “She was smoking a cigarette, “said Mom, making the gesture with her two fingers holding a make-believe Lucky Strike. “Edith bent over and with the lit cigarette, motioned which fireworks she wants.” “I’ll take this one, and that one,” said Edith as she waved the cigarette over the flammable arsenal. “Bam!,” Mom said with excitement. “Everything started going off at once. Uncle George came running out, turning over the table and trying to find a hose to put out the rockets. And a little old lady across the street said , ‘Why don't you wait until it’s dark?’ “ With a flair for the dramatic, Mom pulled back her hair to show us a tiny scar where a Roman candle had whizzed past her head. We’d show great concern and marvel at her ability to stay upright and tell such a horrifying tale…year, after year, after year. Edith Pickles is a story that we kids laugh about and remember every 4th—even though Mom is no longer with us. I’ll bet you have an “Edith Pickles” story in your family history. You know: some quasi-dramatic event that a relative insists upon repeating over and over again—even when that relative can no longer remember much else. There’s something sweet about these little stories that connect past and present, becoming almost code language for a connection that defies description. I’d like to think we honor those Edith Pickles sagas. I’d love to hear your story. Do write me!

Let’s face it: every day brings news of distressing levels of COVID-19 in various parts of the world. Social structures are being questioned, challenged and toppled. Businesses that were legacy are folding. Think J.C. Penney, Nieman Marcus, J. Crew, Chuck E. Cheese, and my favorite... Pier 1. From the hospitality industry to oil exploration, disruption and potential demise are possible. For anyone in a leadership position, the ability to craft solid ground in white water times becomes paramount. (By the way—everyone has a leadership position because everyone has a sphere of influence. Likewise, Dee Hock, founder of VISA, always insisted that you must first lead yourself if you ever hope to lead others.) “Certainty”, in face of today’s world, is “an ability to be counted on'. In other words, a leader can’t be certain what the stock market will do or who might win an election. But, as a leader of others and oneself, there are three keys that offer certainty and a knowledge that the leader can be counted on: Offer candor over charisma. Candor is the ability to be open and honest in expression. To be trustworthy, we need to tell people what we see and feel rather than what is expedient and soothing. Today, we turn to folks like Dr. Fauci who plainly lays out what is the current status with Covid-19. Wishful thinking and fairy tale platitudes damage both credibility and certainty. Speak with truth. Courageous conversations form the basis for courageous cultures* (as outlined by Karin Hurt and David Dye in their newly released book by the same name). That individuals can speak without fear of retribution is HUGE. It invites certainty that an organization can forge ahead with ideas for improvement, for customer support, and for innovation. Focus on what you can control. The first and easiest way to establish control and certainty is with one’s physical body and physical surroundings. For example, determine what exercise you can do for certain: walk, run, yoga, etc. Eat the foods that you know offer strength and vitality. Organize whatever part of the “office” you control. Whether it’s a kitchen counter, a spare bedroom, or an actual office, you can and do control that corner of your world. Own it and organize it. “To learn which questions are unanswerable, and not to answer them: this skill is most needful in times of stress and darkness.” - Ursula LeGuin *Courageous Cultures: How to build teams of micro-innovators, problem solvers, & customer advocates. Karin Hurt and David Dye. Harper Collins, 2020.

Joseph Lalonde specializes in helping young leaders grow their leadership capacities. He presented me with an analogy that I think is perfect for this discordant time. Here are Joseph’s words: There’s Nothing “Fishy” about Resilient Leadership Have you ever watched a movie and a quote stuck with you? That happened to me with a movie released in 2003, Finding Nemo. In this animated Disney production, a young clownfish named Nemo lives with his father, Marlin, in the Great Barrier Reef of Australia. Sadly, Nemo has a bum fin which make his father hesitant about letting his son explore the big, beautiful ocean. Marlin is scared he will lose Nemo just like he lost his wife to a barracuda attack. Dory, a royal blue tang, is Nemo’s best friend with whom he confides his desire to leave “home” and explore. A frenzied shark attack separates Nemo from Marlin and Dory. The young clownfish is scooped up and placed in an aquarium at an Australian dentist's office, leaving Marlin and Dory to set about on a frenzied search for Nemo. (If you’ve ever been a parent, you know the terror of hunting for a missing child.) The search seems endless and futile. Marlin becomes discouraged, grumpy, and tempted to give up. But Dory has three little words to boost Marlin’s sagging spirits: "Just keep swimming." "Just keep swimming” becomes a repeated mantra for a storybook ending. What’s this got to do with leadership in discordant times? Everything, Today, there are days in which anyone in a leadership position might feel tempted to give-up, to turn around, to accept defeat. However, when a leader is moving toward a greater good, toward something more than personal reward, just keep swimming is perfect advice. Despite setback and frustration, leaders who just keep swimming won’t stop when the going gets tough, when the seas are rough, and sharks threaten. “Just keep swimming” reminds us that resilience is the ability to grow THROUGH challenge even though success seems a mirage. The world is a tough place. It can be ugly and leading can be hard. BUT, if the end goal is important enough, personal enough, and big enough—like finding a lost son—Dory’s advice is solid: "Just keep swimming’" Author Biography Joseph Lalonde is an award-winning leadership blogger. He helps young leaders understand what it takes to become a leader and not give up. He does this by sharing his own leadership experiences and Reel Leadership lessons (leadership lessons from the movies). You can connect with Joseph on Twitter.