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  • How to Use Your Work as a Meditation Tool to Change Your Life

    If you find yourself completely stressed at work then The Daily Mind has a solution for you.  So many people spend too many hours at work and then take more work home with them.  The meditation exercise at The Daily Mind helps you disconnect from work enough to help you relax.  Read the entire article here.

  • Life Leadership Lessons - In the Death of a Dog

    Every once in awhile, there comes a story that reminds me that I must learn new skills despite loss and also discover better responses to the vagaries of a world that often seems upside down. Max came to my brother and his family five years ago from the Yankee Golden Retriever Rescue League.  Max was recuperating from a major ACL surgery on his left rear leg when they adopted him and he spent the first months with them learning to walk again. A year ago last month, this lovable Golden was diagnosed with an osteo-sarcoma in his left front leg, forcing amputation.  The surgery and chemo bought him another year during which time, John and his family watched him joyfully and bravely learn to be as fast on three legs as he ever was on four. In fact, on one memorable walk up the seminary hill he even ran down his first squirrel.  The squirrel lived to have bragging rights, but Max was awfully proud of himself.  He also had the pleasure of this past winter’s snow in which he delighted to roll -  part husky at heart . Two weeks ago, they found that the cancer had reappeared as a rapidly growing tumor in his left rear leg and so he ended his time with his family as he began it, but in reverse, learning to manage increasing disability.  Finally this morning it became painfully clear that all his body systems were collapsing -  his hind quarters had ceased to function at all and he had become incontinent . When he passed up a hot dog with the pain medication they knew it was time.  My brother John, Tim and Sasha, with some effort got him into the car and took him to Angel Memorial.  For the second time in seven year the medical staff graciously and skillfully helped them say goodbye to a beloved pet who was a three legged family member.  It was tearful but peaceful and they were able to be with him as he slipped away … as Sasha  affirmed in that moment, “to another plane of existence... but the friendship remains." It will feel very strange without Max’s presence... especially now because in the last two years of his life he would sleep every night up their bed – and on his last night he was joined by both cats.  It is almost as if they all knew this was a final gathering. John’s final observations are those that I really wanted to share with you - my readers.  From Max, we might all learn some of the lessons that dogs are brought into our lives to teach:  wag more, bark less, be willing to forgive and to console, be joyfully grateful for the moment,  and be enthusiastic for each new day.   And even if you don’t catch the squirrel, it was the effort that mattered.

  • Meaningful Talk Makes People Happier

    The March issue of Psychological Science reported a study that found the happiest participants had twice as many substantive conversations and one-third as much small talk as the unhappiest. Scientists at the University of Tucson and Washington University discovered that meaningful and deep conversations are a critical differentiators between happy and unhappy people. Yahoo— here’s validation for what I have always believed and spoken about in my book: Talk Ain’t ’Cheap. It’s Priceless. It’s the same premise that underlies the Conversation Fire Starter Guides that can be downloaded to support Gifts from the Mountain. So, forget the Tweets and the Pings. Try eyeballing at best or phoning at least a colleague or friend and see how much happier you can feel if you actually engage in meaningful conversations.

  • Remembrances Can Give You Goosebumps

    Just back from Washington DC and the awarding of the Congressional Gold Medal. The actual ceremony will be broadcast tonight on CSPAN and has been picked up by all major television and print media. But what you won't see is the Remembrance Ceremony held the day before to honor the 38 women who died in the course of duty as WASP-Women Air Force Service Pilots. Because they were not "official" military, there were no benefits, no gold stars, no flags draped over a coffin, and in at least one case, their fellow WASP passed a hat to send the body home. On Tues, March 9, 2011, hundreds of us stood at the base of the Air Force Memorial. From its hilltop vantage, we looked over the Pentagon and out in the distance to Arlington Cemetery and the Washington Monument. The WASP who could attend were in wheel chairs and walkers--each with their personal military escort. The sky was radiant blue and the stainless steel spires of this Air Force Monument sculpture evoked a clear vision of jet streams hanging in the sky. In quiet, the flags of every branch of the service and our nation's flag were solemnly carried in. A clear voice began singing the Star Spangled Banner and before the second stanza, across the sky came four Air Force jets, peeling off in the "missing man" formation. I sobbed. As each woman's name was read, a military official placed a rose next to a wreath. Taps were sounded and in that moment--some 65 years' later--closure came to these aviators who raced across the sky in service of their country. Amen.

  • Improve Performance: Walk in the Woods

    Researchers have been looking at what happens to our bodies and brains when we walk in woods, in the mountains or by the sea. This study is called ecopsychology. I didn’t make it up!  The Japanese have been studying this for years! Results? People do better on tests involving memory or attention after trekking through the woods than after walking in a city. People have increased levels of physical and mental energy as well as a greater sense of well being after walking along an outdoor path beside a stream. It gives your multitasking brain a break. Time slows down. Stress levels are reduced. Blood pressure and heart rate subside. In short… get up and out (side) for great benefit. If you can't get out to walk in the mountains, consider purchasing my book Gifts From The Mountain!

  • You Can’t Lead What You Can’t Assemble

    Most of the time, Seth Godin is a pretty smart guy at pointing out fallacies in thinking and performance. He gave away books to show the power of viral marketing and purple cows. He taught us that small is now big. He proclaimed why marketers are liars. But I struggle with his latest blog that seems to imply big meetings and events are bogus. He said events are a huge waste of time, talent and treasure. I agree IF—and this is  a big IF: If the meeting does not bring people together in meaningful ways for actually conversations… If it is nothing but grandstanding for a CEO with bells and whistles… If it will not generate buzz, enthusiasm, and understanding for a new product… Then  by all means - forget it. However, human beings want to gather. There is nothing like the immediacy of looking into someone’s eyes, of experiencing a powerful message together, of shaking hands, of batting around ideas in the give and take that is so much more real than stilted chat rooms. I’ve seen major breakthroughs when a huge room of people realize they have similar issues... when  a powerful speaker engages audience’s minds and sends them way thinking in new ways... and when a group of sales folks create their own American Idol competition to compose a song for a new product advertisement.  Laughter, interaction, and real time conversation cement loyalty and commitment. Just can’t see that happening with “frequent, cheap communication.” It’s why I wrote the book, Talk Ain’t Cheap-It’s Priceless. Your thoughts?

  • Communication Skills Rank First for Hiring

    Forget the emoticons and the BTW – shorthand of texting.  Nearly half of employers say they expect college grads to be able to do more. As to what skills they look for in potential hires, effective oral and written communications ranked the highest for 89% of those surveyed.  Second- critical thinking and analytical reasoning skills were chosen  by 81%. So let me ask everyone holding a job right now: how would you rate your skills? When was the last time you critically really looked at your emails or the report you filed?  Can you stand in front of a team and clearly, concisely  present ideas? There are a host of young grads waiting in the wings to take OUR job if you can’t meet the expectations of your leader.  Experience is a fabulous bonus but if you can’t relay effective messages – beware. As for up-and-coming grads, don’t get caught up into thinking that Tweets and chats are the only tool for getting across an idea. Better take a writing class and a speech class. It will give you the leg up when the time comes.

  • Are You Eager For Change?

    Employees have been downsized, laid off, given reduced benefits, forced to work longer and longer hours without additional pay.  Will anyone be surprised when thousands of these employees ditch their unhappy work circumstances as soon as the economy shows a strong recovery?  Anyone who has read the news can see that many companies treated employees miserably when they had the balance of power in their favor.  What happens when the balance shifts and employees become the ones in control?  According to a survey by CareerBuilder and Robert Half International as many as 45 percent of participants plan on changing jobs and/or industries when the economy swings back to the positive as it always does.  This is when companies will really feel the pain as a glut of angry workers march out the doors and the organization is left with huge recruiting and training fees to replace them.  When will corporate America realize that the only truly valuable asset they have is their staff?  That day of reckoning may be coming soon.

  • Terrorists Win if We Fail to Talk and Listen to Each Other

    Have we learned nothing from the disasters that hallmarked this last decade? Beginning with the horror of 9-11 through the disaster of Katrina right up to the Bernie Madoff madness (despite  a 10-year warning from securities executive, Harry Markopolos). The information was there all along but the agencies did not share information. Egos got in the way.  Old procedures hammered efforts and too many people wanted to blame others instead of actually create an information system that works. Now we discover that a failure to communicate allowed the Christmas flight of Northwest #253 to almost go down in flames.  God forbid that the CIA and the FBI should share information with each other.  Why learn from the mistakes of 9-11? How foolish it would have been for the US embassy officials to have put alleged terrorist Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab  on an immediate No-Fly list. Of course, it would have done little immediate good as the lists are sent to the airlines by snail mail.  SNAIL MAIL!!!!!  This last piece of information just puts me over the edge. I have zero pull with government leaders but I sure as heck can influence corporate leaders who do not want to see their departments or companies go down in flames. The secret (which is actually NO secret at all): START TALKING!!! (1)    Bring together the heads of every department and have them talk about what information they need to help them do their job better and what is the MOST EFFICIENT way to get that information. (2)    Make heroes of people/departments who pass along information. (3)    Find out what information is no longer necessary and get rid of it (50 page reports are a waste of time if all that is needed is a summary). (4)    Teach everyone the words to Harry the Happy Hoarder (sung to the tune of Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer). Harry, the Happy Hoarder Harry the Happy Hoarder had a very shiny case. He never shared his data. He was out to win the race. He kept his people guessing. Just so he could call them wrong. “Policy” was the answer — he thought it made him strong. Then one day he passed away. All just shook their heads. No one knew the full “to do”, now that he was dead. So then the company folded. Went into oblivion. Smart people got the message. Now they share with everyone. P.S. Just hide behind “our policy” and never question why. Ruts will stay. It’s been that way. Who knows? It came from “on high”. And lastly, Consider buying a copy of my small but to-the-point little book "Talk Ain't Cheap".

  • Strange musings in a disconnected world.

    PARENTS: How to make teens faint— Tell them you LOVE reading their posts on Facebook. It’s the only way you know what they are doing. TEENS: How to make parents faint— Tell them you can now instantly chat with 128 new friends in your IM Buddies list while they can NOT get two words out of you at the dinner table. MANAGERS: How to make your customers faint— Let them talk to a human being after being caught in an automated doom loop system for an hour. HUSBANDS: How to make your spouse faint— Tell her she can have total control over the TV remote. WIVES: How to make your spouse faint— Tell him you don’t WANT the TV remote. Besides, you can watch whatever you want on your laptop.  Na na na na na.

  • Turn Productivity Pain to Gain

    Information overload equates to a staggering $1.2 trillion in wages wasted each year according to a six year study of over 20,000 information workers.  Time to call a halt to this amazing abuse: (1)  Insist that the “reply all” email button be carefully considered before selecting “send” (2)  Just because information can be sent, do not assume it has value to the recipient. (3)  Establish a boundary for sending and receiving emails. Being on call 24/7 leaves workers exhausted and frazzled. Think of a time frame for rest and renewal.   If you are a manager, practice what you preach and model the boundaried-behavior. (4)  Get professional help for colleagues who seem addicted to connecting.  Fifty-four percent of all professional indicate they are often frustrated by colleagues who huddle over their PDAs during important meetings. (5)  Make a conscious effort to refrain from interruptions and to ask colleagues to respect your time. Workflow that is interrupted by email, “dings”,  IMs or calls results in reduced output and effectiveness. Create interruption management strategies and share them with all. (6)  Use the “IS IT NECESSARY” question before calling or attending a meeting.  If it is merely for sharing information, make sure that it is data that ANNOT be handled via succinct, bulleted correspondence.  Ask if the right people are at the meeting? Too often, the wrong people come because of formality and standard office protocol;. (7)  Seek good trainers who can deliver targeted programs on how to handle email, and teach a methodology for storing and retrieving documents. This is a new communication world and old methods don’t work. (8)  Don’t forget that meeting management is a learned skill. Start the year off right by helping information workers learn just how to conduct effective and efficient meetings. Note that effective and efficient are two distinct outcomes.

  • Don't Let Technology Screw Up Your Relationships

    A Harris Interactive survey for Whitepages.com released findings on what communication modes are most open to misunderstanding. Not surprisingly, 80% of adults found it most easy to misinterpret the tone of e-mail.  Seventy-eight percent found text messages to be misleading, while 71% could also be put off by letters.  Consider this: all these modes are flat, one-sided genres that allow the reader to intuit just about anything into the mix. In our crazy busy world, how often do we automatically push the send key and instantly regret that action? Or how about the mistake of using upper case letters and the reader thinks he is being shouted at?  Then too, in the rush to respond and be brief, single line messages can come across as terse, harsh and often inflammatory.  Small wonder that e-mail might also stand for escalation and error. Words are just that: words. But in the English language, the nuances of verbal inflection and facial expressions make all the difference in true communication. Read the phrase "What ever possessed you to come to this conclusion?" The text message version might even be "Are you nuts!"  Chances are that you are already feeling a negative emotion as you read these words. Even letters run a 71% chance of being read incorrectly. But let's add voice to it. Imagine you hear a very neutral voice on the telephone asking the question, "What ever possessed you to come to this conclusion?"  Imagine that you hear it as if a counselor were talking to you, coming from a place of inquiry rather than accusation.  Your response would be quite different. For this reason, telephone conversations stand a 47% better chance of being correctly interpreted. So telephone conversations are better but not the best communication vehicle.  The amount of subtle and not-so-subtle meaning carried by the eyes and facial muscles is amazing. When face-to-face communication is used, the conversations are correctly understood 63% of the time. With odds like this, the natural assumption is that leaders and anyone dealing with customers would spend more time in either face-to-face or telephone conversations.  But both research and consumer experience indicates the opposite. Bottom line: talk is not cheap-it's priceless. The competitive edge does not have to be more bells and whistles on a CRM system or another layer of voice mail doom loops.  For once, it's not sophistication that's required but rather a remembering that at the end of the day, people want to work for and buy from people with whom they have a relationship. Here's the most powerful mantra for creating that relationship: "Start talking and get to work!"

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